You've found Father McKenzie. But are you really looking for Eleanor Rigby?

Friday, December 23, 2005

The Fell Beast, The Wiccan and the Possessed Cupboard

There are some who say...that The Chronicles of Narnia are an allegory of the Chrsitian story, and embody many positive virtues...but The Last Trumpet does not think so.

I could write endlessly on such material, but instead, I will draw the reader's attention to the author's address ...
Beaver Dam, WI 53916.

As we all know, Beavers are represented in the Narnia source material, but have been toned down and sanitised for younger audiences, but the careful and astute reader will knoiw what Beavers really mean.

The use of the beaver as a place name is surely a sign of influence by demonic forces, as beavers must certainly symbolise those who work at undermining God's true law - and do their work underwater - a short move away from being UPSIDE DOWN - AND they build lodges, like Masons. Evil, evil I say!

Let us not forget that it is the Beavers in Lewis' work who suggest that Aslan is "not a tame lion". In the light of the Last Trumpet ministries reconstuction of Aslan as Satan instead of the commonly (erroroneosly) held belief that he is a Christ-figure, the reader is invited to draw their own conclusions as to what not being a "tame lion" means. Let us not forget the warning of Peter Tthe Apostle, who writes, "
Be sober, vigilant, because your opponent the devil, as a roaring lion, doth walkabout, seeking whom he may swallow up." 1 Peter 5:8



The story of the Narnian Chronicle known as The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe is one of clandestine occult mysticism and is not Sunday School material unless your Sunday School is a defacto witch coven. The story involves a child from the normal everyday or mundane world. This girl, Lucy, who hides in a wardrobe as she is playing a game, suddenly finds herself transported to another world very unlike her own. It is a world of intelligent, talking animals and strange creatures. The little girl soon finds herself having tea with a faun. In witchcraft and ancient Roman pagan mythology, a faun is any of a group of rural deities, which have the bodies of men and the horns, ears, tails, and legs of a goat. The Roman god Faunus was also the god of nature and fertility and was connected to sexual lust. Here let it be noted that in the Narnian Chronicle Prince Caspian, this same strange land the little girl finds herself in is also populated by gods and goddesses; such as Bacchus, the god of drunken orgies, and the Maenads, who were frenzied women driven to madness in the orgiastic cult of Bacchus.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Federation to attack the Dominion?

No, not that Dominion:

November 24, 2005 – A former Canadian Minister of Defence and Deputy Prime Minister under Pierre Trudeau has joined forces with three non-governmental organisations to ask the Parliament of Canada to hold public hearings on Exopolitics – relations with “ETs.”

By “ETs,” Mr Hellyer and these organisations mean ethical, advanced extraterrestrial civilisations that may now be visiting Earth.

On September 25, 2005, in a startling speech at the University of Toronto that caught the attention of mainstream newspapers and magazines, Paul Hellyer, Canada’s Defence Minister from 1963-67 under Nobel Peace Prize Laureate Prime Minister Lester Pearson, publicly stated: “UFOs, are as real as the airplanes that fly over your head.”

Mr Hellyer went on to say, “I’m so concerned about what the consequences might be of starting an intergalactic war, that I just think I had to say something.”

Hellyer revealed, “The secrecy involved in all matters pertaining to the Roswell incident was unparalled. The classification was, from the outset, above top secret, so the vast majority of US officials and politicians, let alone a mere allied minister of defence, were never in-the-loop.”

Hellyer warned, “The United States military are preparing weapons which could be used against the aliens, and they could get us into an intergalactic war without us ever having any warning. He stated, “The Bush administration has finally agreed to let the military build a forward base on the moon, which will put them in a better position to keep track of the goings and comings of the visitors from space, and to shoot at them, if they so decide.”

Hellyer’s speech ended with a standing ovation. He said, “The time has come to lift the veil of secrecy, and let the truth emerge, so there can be a real and informed debate, about one of the most important problems facing our planet today.” ...

- Former Canadian Minister Of Defence Asks Canadian Parliament Asked [sic] To Hold Hearings On Relations With Alien “ET” Civilisations', Yahoo News (Thursday 24 November, 7:00 AM ET

Boy, Canadians are lucky their politics aren't controlled by credulous fundo hicks, like in the Great Wasteland to the south...

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

"They sang as they slew..."

Some grumblings at Amy Wellborn's blog:

"The many children in the cinema actually burst out laughing when the older sister finally shot an arrow and killed the dwarf about to axe her injured brother. Why did they laugh?"

And ditto with Rock Wren:

"The most troubling scene for me was near the end when Susan, in some nod to feminism outside the text of the book, took up her bow and killed the Witch's drawf as it tried to crush Edmund (or Peter, I forget which). The children in the theater, mine included, laughed as the drawf fell over dead with an arrow in his chest. He was a mean and unlikeable character, but it bothered me that kids laughed at the death and that Susan appeared to have no remorse or tears or pain at having to take a life, even if it was a just killing."

Very anti-Lewisian, no? Ad fontes, citoyens!

"War is a dreadful thing, and I can respect an honest pacifist, though I think he is entirely mistaken. What I cannot understand is this sort of semi-pacifism you get nowadays which gives people the idea that though you have to fight, you ought to do it with a long face and as if you were ashamed of it. It is that feeling that robs lots of magnificent young Christians in the [Armed] Services of something they have a right to, something which is the natural accompaniment of courage – a kind of gaiety and wholeheartedness."
- CS Lewis, Mere Christianity, Book Three ("Christian Behaviour: The Three Parts of Morality")

Thursday, December 08, 2005

iPod Chav

Will we see the next episode of 'A Current Affair" focusing on dodgy builders, diet pills, and iPod wearing lower socio-economic class bevans (Aussie slang for the UK's "Chav")? Maybe...

iPod shuffle is top Chav Gadget

Put on your Burberry scarf and switch on your iPod Shuffle. While the iPod nano may be the king of cool, a panel of the UK’s top gadget experts and the staff of Tech Digest and Shiny Shiny have voted its budget sibling the iPod shuffle this year’s ‘Must Chav Gadget.’

'The shuffle is perfect for chavs,' said the judge's citation. 'It’s cheap. It’s by a cool brand, and you can let others know you have one as it is designed to be worn round your neck. As it is white it also accessorises well with those classy gold chains Chavs wear.

The sad part is that the shuffle is the worst player in the Apple range – more like some dodgy back street knock-off than the excellent other iPods. The fact it has no screen so you can’t program it or choose a track – it chooses the music for you – also saves Chav brain cells for the much more important business of, ahem, ‘pimping their rides.’

Runner up in Chav Gadget of the year is the ultra skinny Motorola phone the RAZR. 'Once the height of cool, this has now become standard fixture for every Tom Dick and Chav. Motorola has done it pink, maybe they should be thinking of a Burberry version.'

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Nicolae'd and Dimed

LISA SIMPSON: Dad, we love you, but we just don't think the world is coming to an end. Yet.

BART SIMPSON: Sure, in a hundred years, global warming-- we're goners, but for now, do you think you could lighten up on this "Left Below" stuff?

Slate recently published Grady Hendrix's review of the "Left Behind" movies. Now, I haven't seen any of these because I live outside the Deep South of the USA and my local video stores don't stock any of these opus-es. And every attempt I've made to actually read a LB book has failed: I have a princess-and-the-pea-like intolerance for corny writing. So Hendrix can blast LB all he likes for its hokey dialogue, its plot twists, and its espousal of Dispensationalism in contravention of ye plain and perspicuous teaching of Scripture.

But GH does make three (3) unfair criticisms, though:

[1] Low budget

"... While each installment's budget is estimated to be around $17.4 million, I think that number might be off by $16 million or so. In Left Behind 2: Tribulation Force, for example, Kirk Cameron has to take Ben Judah, a respected rabbi, to the Wailing Wall so that he can tell Jews everywhere that Jesus Christ is Lord. Israel is represented by a few stone walls obviously made of plywood, some Christmas-tree lights, and 500 volunteer extras wearing leftover costumes from a Nativity pageant. The Wailing Wall is patrolled by soldiers dressed in World War II army uniforms. The producers have also dubbed in the sound of goats during scenes set in downtown Jerusalem, which leads to the unusual notion that modern-day Israel is populated by WWII re-enactors, nervous-looking people in bathrobes, and goats. In low-budget movies there are just some things that you can't portray convincingly..."

Okay... so Dogville and Edward II were bad movies then, because of their low-budget, unconvincing sets? Or do they get a pass because their ideological message is more with-it?

[2] Bad guys

"... The United Nations can't even take a leadership role in getting rid of its parking tickets, but in the "Left Behind" universe, the UN wants nothing more than to disarm the world's armies, eliminate famine, and bring about a global peace. This, confusingly, makes them the bad guys...."

You would think anyone allowed to publish articles in Slate would have first been made to write out, four or five hundred times, "REMOVING SADDAM FROM POWER WAS A GOOD THING BUT THAT DOES NOT JUSTIFY THE IRAQ INVASION". Ends, means, etc.

[3] Switching actors

But the dumbest criticism of all is...

"Did the [producers] really think no one would notice that they've replaced Clarence Gilyard, a black actor who played a resistance minister in both previous movies, with a totally different black actor? Do they think that all black actors look alike?"

Oh, those horrible, racist fundamentalists! -- Not. Duh. Film series-es change actors all the time, for all sorts of reasons: actors die, or fall out with the director, or fall pregnant, or whatever. "The Oracle" in The Matrix, for one. "Lady Jessica Atreides" in the Dune and Children of Dune mini-series-es, for another. You want a white Anglo-male as proof? Batman, played by no fewer than four different actors in the past 16 years, three of them in the same franchised series.

So do movie producers think Michael Keaton, Val Kilmer and George Clooney all look alike, then? Did they think we wouldn't notice if Michael Gambon substitutes for the late Richard Harris as Dumbledore? Get real.